Tag Archives: humor

Why the Mommy Wars are Fake and we Should Stop Perpetuating Them

That mom who hurt your feelings is not in the trenches of the Mommy Wars. There are no trenches, and there is no war. The truth is that she is just a bitch and probably always was. She is a grown up version … Continue reading

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The People Running My Gym are Morons — But I’ll Let Them Babysit

I’m pretty sure my new gym is run by morons — but I’m still considering using their babysitting services. I just called to find out their child care hours, and this happened: Employee 1: Welcome to ha ha hahaha ha hahah Employee … Continue reading

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Is soap poisoning my baby? A mom’s journey to find safe soap.

When my daughter was born 16 months ago, the Internet and my mom’s group taught me something that I still haven’t come to terms with: Soap is poisoning my baby. Slowly. Here’s just one example: I learned that the Johnson’s … Continue reading

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10 Reasons Why Being a Mother Makes Me Want to Kill My Dog

Being a mother makes me want to kill my dog. Well, I don’t actually want to end his life, but maybe I can let him outside and just not let him back in. He’s cute, he’ll find a new family. … Continue reading

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Kim Kardashian’s Painless Childbirth and Magnificent Vagina: Another celebrity mom we can totally relate to

Celebrities can seem really far removed from us regular moms. They bounce back to rockin’ bodies ten minutes after childbirth and spit food into their kid’s mouths. But leave it to Kim Kardashian to have a birth story that no … Continue reading

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Yellow Ribbons for Dogs: A multicolored program to protect our children

Have you heard about the international Yellow Dog program? Yellow ribbons tied to a dog’s leash indicate that they “need more space,” meaning it’s in pain, in heat, insecure, or has another reason to possibly bite you. Even though responsible parents teach their children to … Continue reading

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Your New Year’s Eve Photos are Exhausting Me: A mom’s night in

My Facebook feed is full of your New Year’s Eve photos. You all look fabulous. Clearly, you spent a lot of time on your hair and a lot of money on your outfit. You must have had great fun dancing and staying … Continue reading

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